#i.e. quitting and going back to my last save

[sysig]

Undertale good game

[loveanddeepsecrets]

Domestic + Intimate Headcanons Pt. II

An impromptu two parter of me just spitballing (Pt. I for reference). This started out as a cutesy mini headcanon post for Raf’s bday, but quickly grew into hyper specific romantic scenarios and wishful thinking. It’s still probably clear who my mains are 😭 but I did my best to showcase the humility in all LIs

⤠ Disclaimer: I’m quite happy with the intimate headcanons from my initial post and truthfully couldn’t expand too too much without basically repeating myself from last time. So with the exception of Caleb, there’s a bit less spicy bullets this go-round :/

⤠ Tags: 18+, MDNI, *slight spoilers depending on affinity level or personal progress in main story +myths, fluff, mostly gender neutral, but written with an afab + fem!reader in mind

⤠ Word count: 2.1k (mostly proofread)

Xavier

SFW

✧ Eats the raisins you pick out of the trail mix

✧ Always draws stars next to your name when writing you letters/cards

✧ Bookstore dates. At every visit, you pick one of your favourite books to read for each other

✧ After begging him tirelessly to teach you a song, *any song* on the piano, he mischievously chose ‘Heart & Soul’

✧ Saves every voicemail/voice note. He often replays them to stay sane on dangerous solo missions 

✧ On top of that, he made a bunny plushie version of you at one of those 'Build-A-Bear' type shops and used one of your voice notes . He sleeps with it on nights he can't sleep with you

✧ Sprays more cologne on his hoodies knowing you love the scent. He also thinks the extra spritz of fragrance will ward off other men since he knows you borrow his clothes. It’s his silent way of marking what’s his

✧ Loves making you blush. He didn't get enough time to court you in the past timeline on Philos, so he seizes every opportunity to (quite effortlessly) rizz you up to see your flushed expression

NSFW

✧ [canonically makes bolder moves to see how you’d react —secret times lvl 165]

✧ Game head. He gets a bit of an adrenaline rush if you do it while he’s online

✧ Doesn’t give not one shit about how loud you guys are. He probably prefers sex on the couch on the off chance Charlie might be passing through the hallway

✧ Though I still think he’s pretty quiet, he becomes a bit of a whiny mess when you’re edging him

✧ A gripper. Grabs on your ass during cowgirl, your chest during missionary, your hips/thighs during doggy, etc

✧ Sprained his neck from holding your hips down and guiding you when you sat on his face. It left him smirking throughout his recovery. Every painful twitch was a pleasant reminder of a job well done 

✧ Has the fastest pace ot5. He moves at lightning speed when batting wanderers, so he probably moves at a back breaking break neck speed while inside of you 

✧ After rewatching the 'No Restraint' card on YouTube… *sweats* he’s got magic fingers. I’ll put it like this and move on: firm, tiny circles 🫠

Caleb

SFW

✧ 10+ hours long face time calls

✧ Would actually be pretty decent at the claw machine if he wasn't such a massive cheater

✧ Utility man. He's your personal chauffer, home chef, alarm clock, umbrella, trainer, handyman, and so on. He strives to be the perfect emergency contact

✧ Has definitely seen those videos of couples trying to recreate yoga poses and had you try with him (would probably cheat using his evol)

✧ Bounces his leg if you scratch that one spot on his head when you play with his hair

✧ You always end up sitting on his lap when cuddling watching tv or reading peacefully together 

✧ Holds pinkies more often than holding hands

✧ Super athletic and adventurous dates i.e. zip lining, skydiving, paragliding, kayaking, hiking, etc. He’s patient, encouraging, and talks you through the scariest parts of the activity and rewards you with several kisses in between telling you how brave you were

NSFW

✧ Hands down has the roughest sex regularly ot5

✧ Mile high club

✧ Orgasm denial + overstimulation 

✧ LOUD, TALKATIVE, and MESSY 

✧ Sloppy eater

✧ He expects a sloppy eater in return. Is probably the type to grab your head and start guiding you when he’s close 

✧ Ik I said Xavier was bossy, but this man? His gravity evol? His colonel position? CONTROL FREAK

✧ Likely has the biggest “Sir” kink

✧ While I do think he aligns slightly more with booktok Sylus, I can’t see where degradation would fit with their dynamic. You’re the very thing he wants to shield and protect. Why would he degrade what he cherishes?

✧ On the softer side, he’s the type to melt into your touch. There’s true devotion in his eyes (and heart) when you’re making love

✧ On the days where he’s not rough, the sex is more sensual and almost tantric 

✧ Will always find a way to be physically closer to you during the act. Whether it’s putting his forehead on yours, burying his face in your neck, hugging your waist, or simply holding hands 

✧ You both probably cried (happy tears) after your first time. Being intimate felt like a confirmation from the universe that you knew each other more than words could express. There was no trial and error, you just knew 

Sylus

SFW

✧ Hot air balloon rides

✧ Monogram matching robes

✧ Secret fan of game shows. He thinks they’re hilarious— or in his words “highly amusing”

✧ Bought you a birdhouse + birdfeeder for your apartment after he noticed you birdwatching on the last date 

✧ Purposely chooses horror films on movie nights on the chance you’ll hold onto him and hide your face in his chest. He’ll laugh and make some remark about being hurt that you’d use him as a shield, but will hold you tighter and soothe you later in the night when you’re too scared to sleep

✧ Random slow dances. In the kitchen on the nights you make dinner together; in his study while music emits from his record player; in the bathroom, sleepily swaying side to side while lazily brushing your teeth 

✧ Whenever you're holding hands, he often aimlessly draws random shapes on your ring finger

✧ I think all the LADS men have a default position they fall into when getting close or snuggling up. For Sylus, it’s resting his chin on your shoulder. It’s the perfect place to capture your scent plus, he can hear and feel your heartbeat. Of course he’ll playful bite or nuzzle into your neck, but he rests his head there because it’s most familiar and comforting to him and his old dragon form

NSFW

✧ Road head 

✧ Mile high club

✧ Eye contact 

✧ Has a secluded sex dungeon even Luke & Kieran don’t know about

✧ Due to the nature of his job, I don’t think he’d engage in explicit sexting. Too many people on his case and has probably dealt with his fair share of hackers. If one of your messages/photos/videos leaked anywhere, it would be the end of the N109 zone and the world as we know it 

✧ That being said, if he wants to make home movies, it’s done with a vintage film camera to ensure the utmost privacy

✧ More of a grunter and groaner than a moaner. The few times he does moan, is when he’s buried between your legs

✧ I actually think he’d be into role play. He likes how you always keep him quick on his feet in your relationship, and will often humour and indulging in the change of pace. He’d like this even more in the bedroom

✧ Chuckles to himself and humours you whenever you suggest 69ing bc he knows you’ll inevitably just lay there with his dick idle in your hands, while you whimper on top of him

✧ Stamina coach. His methods for overstimulation are twofold. While he loves the state of you withering and coming completely undone, he also does this to help you expand your limitations and enjoy each other for as long as he can go. I already said he’s a pleasure dom, but he’s a pleasure dom with a purpose

Zayne

SFW

✧ Botanical garden tours

✧ Couples ice skating during the holiday season 

✧ Uses his surgical skills to patch up injured plushies [x] 

✧ He may or may not have added an extra rest day or two in your doctor’s note to Jenna so he can spend more time with you. He’ll deny it and insist you need the additional rest, and who better to take care of you other than your doctor?

✧ There’s something about the way he holds your hand that’s sickeningly sweet. Gentle, slightly cool to the touch that warms up quickly, with loving caresses

✧ Surprised you to a dessert degustation for your anniversary. Each dish is a highlight of the standout desserts you tried over the year

✧ Occasional late night strolls along the river. He passively recalls scenes from the western dramas you watch and (successfully) tries skipping rocks

✧ Enjoys exploring artistic outlets with you. Often suggests different workshops to try i.e. stained glass studios, culinary classes, candle making, terrarium building, etc

✧ A bit needy nowadays. To experience a love he never knew he could have, makes him hold your hand a little more tightly, hug you a few seconds longer and kiss you twice as many times as he did before

NSFW

✧ Much like Sylus, he’s also big on eye contact (when he’s in control)

✧ Literally the cutest thing ever when you go down on him. He’ll keep his composure, and lustfully tell you what he wants, but gets so flustered and stuttering as the pleasure builds and he gets close

✧ Truthfully, I don’t like to compare Zayne and Caleb all that much, but the love making between you two is also very tantric

✧ If you listen to the way he kisses you, it’s pretty similar to how he eats you. When completely drunk off your juices, it’s like he’s breathing you in. There’s a desperation to his licks and kisses, feening for the taste of your nectar

✧ He’s also the type to spell out his name with his tongue over and over again. Think of it as a spell. He needs to hear you call to him

✧ Incredibly patient. Foreplay isn’t some tit for tat curtesy thing, it’s important to him. He’s less of a tease and more methodical. "Relax into my arms. No, I'm not bullying you. I need you to come for me again. You should always warm up before stretching, and I don't want to hurt you so please, come for me love. Can you do that for me?"

✧ A stickler for clear communication. You must speak in full complete sentences. It’s not enough to say just say “Please.” What exactly are you pleading him to do?

✧ Slight exhibitionist. He’ll never allow you to get caught, but likes the challenge of finding the quickest ways to cover your mouth— using his hand, tie or lips to stifle your moans

Rafayel

SFW

✧ Hates going in hot springs, saunas, or jacuzzies. He’ll say he feels like a boiling crab

✧ Asked to keep your first completed sketchbook that are filled with many one on one art lessons with him

✧ Can’t sleep if some semblance of you isn’t with him. Will literally drag or carry you to the couch so he can take a nap. You don’t have to nap with him, just lay next to him and stroke his hair

✧ Apart from Moments, you’re the only one he’s following on all socials

✧ Always responds with a stream of texts in all caps and several emojis when you send him a selfie 

✧ His biggest artistic aspiration is to find just the right pigments/colours that encapsulates you. Next is finding a colour palette that encapsulates both of you 

✧ Used to think you were mocking him when you took him on aquarium dates

✧ Your pearl engagement ring was made from the tears he cried while drafting his proposal speech [x]

NSFW

✧ Next to Sylus, he’s a comfort king. Making sure you have enough pillows underneath you during missionary; repositioning you when he notices your head leaning off the edge of the bed; several consent check ins; "my hands aren't too cold, right?"; taking over when your legs start to tire out from riding him, etc

✧ Unpopular opinion, I think he’s the most into period sex out of the five. You really think a MERMAN is scared of the red sea???

✧ Speaking of which, he’s extra sensitive to your scent and the way you feel when you’re on your cycle. Though he won’t necessarily initiate anything 

✧ Has you take the week off for Ebb Day. You’ll need the extra down time and he’s more than happy to spend the rest the week caring for you till you're back in good health

✧ On particularly intense— passionate rounds, he starts swearing/speaking in Lumerian

✧ Pretty gentle with you when you go down on him. He’s usually holding your hair back, softly running his fingers through your strands or caressing the back of your neck 

✧ The biggest tease when he’s eating you out and MEAN about it too. Giggling when you mewl. That annoying "mmm?” when you start to get louder. "Speak up, cutie."

✧ Best stroke game. Ik I said this last time, but I’m dying on this hill. Dizzying backshots, frontshots, sideshots— literally whatever position you’re in, his hips are steady, fluid, and unrelenting

ꨄ︎ A/N: Thanks for reading 🤍 these lists were a bit harder to make this time ngl. Quite a few bullets from pt. I are now canon— which I’m happy about ofc, but it made it harder to bounce around new ideas since there’s fewer “what ifs”. It’s probably best to end this series here tbh. But I’m definitely open to different content suggestions to post next!

[x] - denotes credit for headcanon inspo.

⤠ dividers by saradika-graphics & anitalenia

[mozart-in-a-gokart]

My Thoughts On How TUA Season 4 Should Have Ended

Read it like a script outline maybe? Idk I never took screenwriting?

Way more detail below the cut:

Im so sorry if this whole thing comes across as very fan fictiony towards the end. I did my best.

::Here are some refreshers for some of the concepts I touch on at the beginning and where my logic comes from::

Note: I may have spelled Luther as Luthor throughout this and I realized this only after I was just about to post this so… bear with me.. thank you.

So we learned these things previously:

Season 1

Viktor was the trigger for the big world ending apocalypse

Season 2

Viktor was the trigger for the 3rd world war that ended the whole world

Season 3

Viktor has the ability to transfer marigold .We learned that from the whole storyline with Harlan in season 3.

Viktor had the ability to stop Allison from resetting the universe but chose-not to at the very end of the season.

Edited Addition: The Kugalblitz itself was the result of a grandfather paradox involving the umbrellas in the sparrow timeline. (I.E. You go back in time, you kill your grandfather, therefore you have no way of existing later.). Their parents were dead so the universe couldn’t handle these extra variables that shouldn’t and theoretically couldn’t have existed, so it collapsed in on itself.

Season 4

When the universe is reset all of the October 1st kids seem to exist because Lila also exists in the reset universe (we don’t see the sparrows unfortunately so this is a toss up but for the purposes of this I assume they exist we just never saw them.)

Edited to clarify a point: Lila’s parents are still alive in this timeline, meaning she was born to two parents with no marigold. This further backs up the idea that the same must be true for the rest of the Hargreeves siblings because if it wasn’t, one of two things would have had to have occurred. One: The marigold would have had to have been released. However, If it had the umbrellas would all have been born with their abilities, which they did not have at the end of season 3 in the new universe. Two: Another Kugelblitz would have occurred because they wouldn’t have parents and therefore would have had no explanation for existing in the new universe, causing yet another cascade failure.

Abigail has this insane amount of guilt that comes from creating both the Marigold and Durango.

The show seems to establish that in Abigail and his marriage, Reginald is the one who considers the children expendable and always has. Abigail seemed to care about them quite a bit (at least until the last episode)

Abigail manages at the last second to convince Reginald to die with her and let the cleanse happen because it’s THEIR FAULT all this is happening, not the umbrellas

When Lila and Allison’s family get on the train they do in fact transfer over and are inserted into the “correct” and “one true” timeline. They are essentially rewritten by the universe to allow them to exist there.

With all these things in mind this is what I think should have happened

Abigail should still have managed to convince Reginald that this was all their fault but it should have happened earlier in the episode.

Abigail should have put an emphasis on the fact that it isn’t the umbrellas fault at all and that they have a right to exist. That it’s the least they can do is try and help them figure a way out of this after everything they have been put through both in Abigail’s name, and by Reginald himself.

Reginald finally grows as a person, accepts this, and they both go with Viktor on the crusade to save Ben.

While on the journey Abigail learns about Viktors ability to transfer Marigold from one person to another and she LATCHES onto this.

Abigail and Reginald have a discussion about a plan that involves transferring the Marigold to both of them of Viktor can’t manage to convince Ben.

(Maybe there’s a scene similar to season 2 where Viktor talks with sparrow Ben in his mind. Sparrow Ben ends up making the point that they have to let him go. HES NOT THEIR BEN. He NEVER has been. They have to let him go. Let him do this selfish thing. He misses HIS family. His SPARROWS. Let him die.)

This is a good end IMO for sparrow Ben because he isn’t out Ben. We’ve all been talking about Ben being Ben for so long we forget this Ben is literally A DIFFERENT PERSON. He sees the umbrellas as his family’s murderers. It’s tragic but, I can’t see this Ben ever truly growing to love the umbrellas the way he seemed to with the sparrows

With that Obviously the plan to stop the cleanse by convincing Ben falls apart. Plan A never works.

They all would congregate back at the dilapidated Hargreeves mansion.

They all still talk about options and Five still says that the only way to end this once and for all is by destroying all of the marigold (Instead of being all defeated about it I think he should be angry and wired when he’s talking about it. I hate this drowned kitten looking guy. Where’s my embodiment of the it’s always sunny Pepe Silva Meme)

While they all argue about trying to use the subway to save themselves and Five doesn’t think it will work Reginald steps forward and tells them all to be silent.

They all force of habit stop and stare at him.

He says that he and his wife may have a way to save them all.

Klaus, Luther, Diego, and Five are all against letting him talk

Lila, Allison and Viktor are willing to let him talk what harm could he do now at the end.

He asks Five about the subway and if he’s right that you leave it at the exact moment in time you entered. Five agrees as far as he knows that’s correct.

Reginald and Abigail ask Five to blink all of them there, right now so they have a bit more time to explain.

Five says no not until they tell everyone what’s going on. He’s had enough running around and beating around the bush. Reginald explains things now.

Reginald does.

He explains that their bodies in this particular universe were not made originally of marigold. They were just born here. So theoretically, if they no longer had Marigold in their system. The Umbrellas themselves won’t need to be erased. They could attempt to escape with their family.

Luther points out that they don’t know how to extract the marigold.

Viktor reminds them that he can transfer it but he doesn’t know how good he is at it. Plus he needs to transfer it somewhere. He can’t just release it.

Reg : “That is correct. You would need to transfer the marigold to another vessel. It won’t work if it’s not in something living.”

Diego: “What’re you saying?”

Five: “He’s saying one of us has to stay behind Diego.”

Allison: “So what? You’re asking one of us to volunteer? To choose to be erased?”

Everyone starts up angrily shouting at Reginald who is interrupted by Abigail.

Abigail: “None of you would stay behind.”

Five: “Elaborate?”

Abigail: “Five you blink everyone to the subway. While we’re there Viktor transfers all of the marigold from all of you to Reginald and myself. All of you board the train. We will stay behind.”

Everyone is silent and staring

Klaus: “you’re cool with this Dad?”

Reginald: “I am not your father young man. I am Not your Reginald Hargreeves. I am however, a Reginald who knows how to respect hard work, which you all seem to have been doing for a great many years trying to stop exactly this thing from occurring. I understand that my wife and I helped set this in motion and I am nothing if not accountable.”

Luther: “wow… “

Abigail: “Let us do this?”

Lila is immediate in her agreement

Five doesn’t like the idea of this but it’s all they’ve got.

They all start teleporting as the Bennifer Cleanse beast starts shattering the windows to the house

We watch time seem to slowdown because the creature understands that the marigold isn’t “in this dimension anymore” it doesn’t know where to look.

We watch a subway staircase form in the center of the room and see tendrils of the Flesh Creature winding around it but never down in it because it doesn’t have a way into the subway. (You have to blink there)

We have a moment where the Umbrellas link hands in a circle and glow (like we do every season. It’s tradition)

We go around the circle through each of the umbrellas faces and watch the marigold pulled from them slowly. And transferred into Reginald and Abigail who are standing in the center we see it leave them and they all collapse

Viktor still has a little bit left in him and says he doesn’t have the strength to transfer it

Everyone looks defeated at that

Diego and Lila while they’re looking at one another

Allison and Klaus are hugging one another

Luther and Five collapse on the bench

Viktor says it’s alright. That he’s gonna stay. He’s gonna choose to stay and be part of the solution this time. He owes it to them for ending the world three separate times (He’s gonna choose to save everything and not cause it)

They all hug him at the door to the train and say “goodbye”

Five is keeping the train door open by standing in front of them

Klaus hugs Viktor and thanks them for being the only normal one of the bunch and keeping them down to earth

Klaus: and hey! Don’t sell yourself short! That third time wasn’t really YOUR fault. Allison was the one who—

Allison shoves Klaus out of the way and into the train.

Allison and Viktor hug the longest out of everyone.

Allison: “I’m gonna miss you so much.”

Luthor picks Viktor up and spins them around : “I’m sorry for not being a better brother. You deserved more.”

Viktor: “ make it up to me by finding Sloane in the next world and naming your first born Viktor.”

Luther is laughing and nodding boarding the train

Diego shakes Viktor’s hand and apologizes for blaming them for so much in previous years. “I was really closed off and I should have been better. I love you brother.”

Viktor: I love you too Diego”

Diego’s holding back tears as he boards.

Five is the last to say good bye

The two are just staring at one another quietly

Five: “You know… I never thanked you…”

Viktor: “For what?”

Five: Not giving up on me the first time

Viktor is confused

Five: “When I disappeared years and years ago. When I came back pogo told me about the Sandwiches and the lights and everything. I know it’s too late, but I’d be remiss if I never said it. So, thank you. For not giving up on me.”

Viktor smiles at him.

Viktor: “I guess I should say the same.”

Five cocks his head

Viktor: “You never gave up on us. Every single time the world was ending. You never gave up on saving us. You drove yourself insane trying to save us all and we never thanked you.”

Five scoffs

Five: “Guess we’re both thankless assholes…”

Viktor: “Nah”

Viktor shakes their head and pulls five in for a hug

Viktor: “Thank you for everything Max.”

Five slowly hugs them back

Five: “Don’t call me that”

Viktor pulls back

Viktor: I’m sacrificing myself for your asses. I can call you whatever I want.”

Five steps back

Five: “Goodbye Viktor”

They give all wave at Viktor as the doors start to close

Suddenly an umbrella Lodges itself in the doorframe and everyone including the audience is shocked

Abigail has stopped the doors from closing

Viktor whips around to see Reginald right behind him

Reginald: “Must I do everything around here.”

Reginald, now with marigold and Lila’s abilities of Mirroring, mirrors Viktors ability and removes the last of the marigold from him before pushing Viktor through the doors and onto the train.

Abigail lets go and the train doors close leaving all of the Umbrellas and extended family shaken

Abigail waves at them as the train starts pulling away and we see Reginald tip his cap to them

Reginald: Farewell Children of the Umbrella Academy.

Abigail: You were Extraordinary.

The train pulls away and we see Reginald and Abigail take each other by the arm and walk towards the exit of the subway

The camera is frozen in place and we watch them ascend the stairs. We hear the scream of the The Cleanse Creature echo the the subway stars start shaking

Tiles crack and light starts flashing from the stairway the ceiling begins to cave in and we transition to the umbrellas on the train

Viktors been helped up and they’re all dazed and confused just waiting for “it” to “happen” whatever “it” is

We get a similar scene to the original scene where they’re letting the cleanse consume them

During this scene is when Five explains that they will all likely forget one another. Because their parents are in all different parts of the country. They will have never met. It’s a hard reset.

This makes all of them sad (OBVIOUSLY) so we get the same cleanse conversation as more of a we don’t know if we will ever see each other again and if we don’t I just wanna say this to you all kind of conversation

We still end it with Klaus saying “You know, I just wanna say I love you guys… but you are all assholes.”

Everyone laughs and as they’re laughing music swells

We get a cut of the subway flashing colors because the reset is happening

We get flashes of color washing over each of them with the various scenes of them from previous seasons and those timelines disappearing

We flash through them in order of number

Luthor

Diego

Allison

Klaus

Five

Lila (as six instead of Ben roll with me I promise I have a reason)

And Viktor

The final flash is a long shot of all of them smiling in the train car and the camera zooms down it and into the same wormhole at the end that leads to the “real” timeline

We cut to black

There’s beats of silence (yes multiple)

The audience is thinking “Are we ending it here? Is it gonna be ambiguous? Are we about to see credits?

No.

Slowly a stereo fades into view we’re staring at it

Someone walks in front of it wearing a very familiar jean coat

We hear the stereo button click and The song “I Think We’re Alone Now” starts playing

We watch Viktor pull a woman who looks very much like sissy into their arms and they start to dance laughing loudly. There’s a pure white violin in the corner that looks like it’s been used so often and so long but so lovingly. We zoom out the window out the window and see this is on a farm somewhere we focus on the windmill wheel turning

It transitions to the wheel of a beat up old car arriving at the park. We watch Lila and Diego’s kids stumble out of the car holding skate boards and bubble wands. They’re older than they were. Lila shakes her fist at them from the passenger window. She’s shouting at them. You can hear her shouting be careful! And then shouting more in Punjabi

We don’t see who’s in the drivers seat but we zoom in on Lila’s fist and it transitions to another fist. This one gripping a paper and shaking it as it moves across a classroom towards the front.

We follow the page as it’s placed on a desk then pan up to a figure in a suit writing complex equations clearly having something to do with physics or rocket ships in chalk across a board

On the desk is a nameplate that comes into view only when the figure turns around to address the room and we see very clearly it’s an adult Five. The nameplate reads Maximillian Murphy PHD.

He’s addressing the class and telling them to get their assignments in by Monday if they want input before the final assessment. Mrs. Murphy will take them from you if you have them now. He gestures to the woman who set the paper down on his desk in the transition who comes around the desk and sits on it. She’s wearing a polka dot blouse. He’s finally found a real Delores.

The two smile at one another and we pan up to the ceiling and zoom in on a vent grating which transitions to the front grill of a bus

We see muddy shoes scramble up the steps and cut to the inside of the bus. We see the figure only from the back as they scramble down the middle of the bus clutching a rucksack wearing very old fashioned Amish clothes. We only see them from the front when finally fall into a seat next to a guy reading a book wearing dog tags who looks like he’s just getting back from deployment somewhere

We watch Klaus turn and greet Dave in the modern day and hear them have the same conversation we heard on the bus in Vietnam on this bus in the middle of nowhere USA

We transition from Klaus laughing here to a time a bit in the future. Klaus laughing wearing clothes more like him and pulling Dave down a street past a shop window full of movie memorabilia we hear him saying something about wanting a good view of the take off. Trust him just come this way’

We zoom in on a script that transitions to one that lands on a coffee table. We watch Ray pick it up and Allison settle herself on a chair near by. We watch and hear them talk about this new pilot for this new show And how “it’s a good one I can feel it” “okay. Let’s do this then.” In the background we can see acting awards on a shelf. Alison isn’t just a commercial actress. She has been in things and is good at it. Claire comes barreling down the stairs and jumps between them on the couch. “Wheres the remote! It’s starting!”

We see Allison and Ray lean in forgetting the scripts

We pan across the room and it all melts away into a car radio

We see a hand turn it up and we hear it talking about the first launch nasa’s funded on a while. Space stuff.

We follow the figure who turned up the radio as they lean out of the car and gesture wildly as Lila and the kids to come over here quickly!

You see all of them start sprinting to the car to listen.

We watch through the front windshield of the van Lila climb in and kiss Diego. The kids all pile in and stare at the radio in Awe.

We get a shot of Diego turning up the radio dile which transitions to a gloved hand adjusting diles on what is clearly the console of a rocket ship. We pan up and it’s LUTHOR. Space boy ready for take off

We hear the the count down of a take off start over the last portion of “I think we’re alone now” by Tiffany

The screen gets smaller until Luthor is in a neat box in the middle of the screen as we count down characters are added to the screen in their own boxes all tuning in to watch this launch

Ten - Sloan with a little girl on her lap pointing at the tv from the couch in a house that is so clearly hers and Luthors. She’s mouthing wave bye to daddy! It’s your daddy! Bye space boy!

Nine - Dot, Herb, the handler, and someone with a gold fish print Hawaiian shirt (AJ for sure), dressed to the nines are sitting in a backyard with a radio on listening and laughing

Eight - hazel and Agnes turn up the volume of a Tv at a doughnut shop they both clearly own. Hazel is behind the counter and Agnes’s waiting tables. The few tables seated have people we recognize there. Cha cha. Eudora and Detective Beaman.

Seven - Viktor and Sissy watching the tv over their living room couch

Six - Grace stopping with a baby carriage at a store front filled with tvs. Her baby on her hip pointing at the tv mouthing the the word rocket to the baby who giggles

Five - Five, His Wife and a bunch of other professors or huddled around an old tv in a lab in a physics building. one of the scientists is holding an open notebook with sketches of the comic characters in it. It’s Gabriel Bá. You can see him mouthing “come on come on!”

Four - Klaus and Dave sitting on a blanket on a hill near the nasa bad along with a ton of other people on blankets pointing and holding binoculars. Gerard way and his wife are among them.

Three - Allison, Ray, and Claire all leaning in to watch eagerly

Two - Diego Lila and all their kids leaning in to hear

One - every box but the ones with the Umbrellas go black.

It’s a close up of all of their eyes. They all read as excited. Looking up towards the future. “the beating of our hearts is the only sound”

All those squares go black on some tambourine beats

Houston we have liftoff.

Credits roll.

END CREDITS SCENE.

A close up of Ben’s eyes. We zoom out. We’re back on that train in Korea. We see him frown a second as he realizes something. He puts the book down a second. He looks out the window. Looks at his phone. There are text messages that read “dude where are you? We’re watching the launch without you!. How’d you miss this?!”

You see him realize.

In Korean “Motherfu—“

We cut to black again and cut him off.

The End

Is it cheesy? Maybe? But you know I think we deserve a little cheesy.

[shrinkthisviolet]

im curious. why do you ship flashvibe. i see them as just best 100% platonic bros and i cant imagine them romantic

Ooh this would be a better question for @alittleflashvibe (who can absolutely feel free to hop in with reblogs or comments or whatever, really 👀) but I will take a crack at it myself:

So first of all, let me preface by saying, none of this is going to be me going “see?? No platonic explanation!!” because that’s a) canonically false and b) nonsense. Barrisco, for all that I do ship them, is canonically a friendship, and I value that highly. You can absolutely choose to interpret this all as solely platonic, and that’s totally fine! Their relationship is strong either way, and it’s not “better” or “worse” from either perspective. So just keep that in mind.

Second of all, I’ll assume you’re someone who’s open to shipping Barry with guys (otherwise this discussion is sorta pointless 😅).

Third of all, this will include comparisons to Westallen because...duh, they're canonically romantic, and I need a point of comparison. I love both ships, mind you, this is simply for academic purposes.

With all that said, let’s begin! And since this got long, the rest is below the cut :) enjoy!

Heart Eyes:

Okay so we know Barry does this a lot, right? Almost exclusively with Iris (his canon best-friend-who-he-has-a-crush-on -> girlfriend/fiancée -> wife)…and with Cisco. Cisco, too, does this a lot. Observe, if you will:

This post by the amazing @icedteaandoldlace (who can also hop in if so inclined), compares the Westallen proposal and the "the unvierse wants us to be bros" speech. No, seriously. Look at how alike the scenes are. Barry's heart eyes in those scenes...IMMACULATE! He doesn't give those heart eyes to anyone else

Bonus: notice Cisco’s reactions when we do see them. Earnestly hanging on Barry’s words…and Barry’s encouragement gets him to smile 🥰 just like Iris whenever Barry encourages her (see: the s4 scene when he encourages her as Team Leader and she smiles sincerely through her tears)!

Also...this parallel: "You've always been my hero" ~Barry to Cisco as he's walking toward sort-of-death + "The Flash may be the city's hero, but you, Barry Allen, you're my hero." ~Iris to Barry in her vows

Physical Touch:

Physical touch is canonically the way Barry shows his affection/love (“we all know touch is your love language” is a canon line of dialogue). He does it with Joe, Henry, Iris…and a lot with Cisco, who constantly touches/hugs Barry too:

Something interesting about that last one…I feel like I’ve seen that one somewhere before:

(I made that gif :D)

Oh and uh...remember when I said we'd get back to talking about Cisco doing something risky to save his life? Let's talk about that for a second.

Let's talk about how Iris and Cisco react to losing/the prospect of losing Barry post-s3/s4 and s6:

Post-s3:

Iris: Quits her job, becomes Team Leader in Barry's absence so she can use her skills to help out, wanting to honor Barry's words ("keep growing, keep loving, keep running, for me") and knowing Cisco can't lead the Team alone because he's strung out. Argues with Cisco about getting Barry back, because she is understandably worried that it'll make things worse, cost them someone else...and/or Barry will either already be dead, or will die as a result of their actions (i.e. she fears losing Barry all over again)

Cisco: Hyperfocuses on saving Barry ("quits his job", so to speak, because he's not being Team Leader as Barry intended), uses his skills to help out by building a Quark sphere to save Barry, goes forward with his plan despite Iris's misgivings so he can honor Barry's words ("he also said that everyone would look to me after he was gone. So look to me."). In the aftermath, modifies the suit extensively because he fears losing Barry all over again)

s6:

Iris: Is distraught and horrified at how easily Barry accepts his death, tries to talk him out of it. She takes up the charge of recruiting Ryan Choi, Paragon of Humanity, empathizes with him about his fear, draws on their similarities to convince him.

(She does not pull risky manuevers here, since it's E90 Barry who saves our Barry, but she did back in s3, when she shot Savitar, a speedster and her almost-killer (and also a future version of Barry), to save Barry's life)

Cisco: Makes a risky call to try and save Barry's life, defends himself fiercely when Barry gets upset about it, is distraught and horrified at how easily Barry accepts his death

Bonus:

it's relief in Barry's eyes there, and worry. Barry was mad at Cisco earlier in the episode, but...in this moment, none of that matters. Cisco's doing something risky to save his life (as he canonically does often) and Barry's relieved but also terrified it might go sour. And...well, you saw from one of the gifs earlier how enthusiastic he was once this rescue succeeded - he beamed up at him, all "you've always been my hero" (canon quote) and took his hand to be helped up, just like in a fairytale.

Just a couple of guys nerding out together 🥰

Barry using a shared memory to prove he's not an imposter 👀

Iris and Cisco teaming up to pull Barry out of the Speed Force! Note that Cisco almost succeeds at this 👀 he only fails because Barry is not yet ready to leave - by the time Iris tries, Barry is ready. I've always thought Cisco could've pulled Barry out of the Speed Force too, lightning-rod style.

This post compares some Westallen and Barrisco moments! Specifically, some Iris and Cisco reactions to Barry (very similar, you'll note!)

And there you go! As mentioned, none of this is me going "AHA see, Barrisco is definitely romantic", but moreso pointing out why I ship them via their parallels to Westallen (which is widely considered one of the It Ships of DC in general, especially for Barry). Hopefully this changed your mind, and if not, hopefully you enjoyed the ride anyway!

(and I meant what I said: @alittleflashvibe and @icedteaandoldlace, feel free to weigh in. Same for any other Barrisco shippers! I'm sure I didn't get everything, though I did try to hit the major highlights)

[maythevoidnotscreamback]

My opinion given form: Zelda’s True Identity is Hylia and always has been

I’ve been thinking about how Rhoam and everyone else, Zelda too if unconvincingly, is so freaking adamant that “prayer will unlock her Sealing Power” when we see the lie in the second-to-last memory of BotW. And I’ve been wondering… why? Why is almost everyone adamant about this, especially when she’s been doing it for over a decade with nothing but grief and despair to show for it?! 

I mean, she’s a frickin’ scientist! She must’ve heard the phrase “to do the exact same thing over and over again and expecting different results is a mark of insanity”. So why?!

I theorize that it’s because of who Zelda is that it doesn’t work for her. She’s the Spirit Maiden, the Princess of Destiny, the Goddess Hylia reborn. Which means that, just like Link, certain rules don’t apply to her that it might with anyone else. The Power of her Line might truly be ‘unlocked’ through prayer, (that is, if an unintentional game of Telephone hasn’t been going on for generations {I.E: one daughter had trouble with accessing her power and her mother taught/showed her how but being a child she hadn’t realized that she was a rare exception; that she hadn’t needed to teach her own daughter(s) how to access their power who’d she’d then tell they had to do the same when the next generation came about} until ‘thought’ became ‘fact’) but that might only apply to those of her Line who aren’t the one whose Soul is the originator of said Power. Why? Well, I imagine that trying to pray to yourself for a power you most likely already possess, (that you were born with, you just have no idea or remember how to use it) would be quite stupid, not to mention impossible.

Basically, the analogy I'm gonna use is: Before Calamity (or the Day of the Burning Fields) struck poor Zelda is standing out in the freezing cold with nothing but a flimsy white dress to protect her, knocking on a locked door belonging to a house that has all the lights on. Thing is, she’s been told all her life, maybe even by her mother too before her death, that she has to wait until the owner answers to be let inside. What she doesn’t know, due to various popular beliefs regarding reincarnation about remembering Everything in the Inbetween but forgetting once reborn, is that the house belongs to her and the key to open the door is within her knocking fist, the key the only reason she’s not died of hypothermia, but she’s too numb to feel it and too cold to unclench her fist. It’s only because of Link coming along and trying all he can to warm her back up, neither noticing something drop at their feet while Zelda struggles against him in her ignorant stubbornness, before he finally collapses once everything is almost said and done because, despite being a man and a helluva lot more dressed and prepared for the weather, Zelda has been in the cold for so long she doesn’t feel it enough for it to affect her anymore, not to mention that Link had been using a lot of his own energy trying to help her, to keep her alive, especially once she stopped fighting him. It is only when she goes to help him in return that she sees the key needed to get inside the oh-so warm house and decides ‘damn the rules’ to save him.

“But what about After Calamity when Link wakes up” I hear you cry, “he prays to Hylia for more Stamina or Health in exchange for four Spirit Orbs and She responds! If what you say is true then that’s Zelda!” I hear you continue. “And?!” I’d reply. Who’s to say it isn’t Zelda in her capacity as Hylia?! She can telepathically contact Link every Blood Moon and at other various points depending on how you play the game. Not to mention that she admits that she watched every step of his journey even though she was busy holding Calamity in the castle. Like, just because going to the statue doesn’t trigger a Voice-over doesn’t mean that it can’t be Zelda. Hell, it could be that it being a statue, or the spoiler of what happened to her during TotK, is causing a type of ‘interference’ that makes her sound different or that ‘logic’ says is impossible. And that’s without looking at the whole... thing regarding the Hero’s Shade in Twilight Princess! The Hero’s Shade is meant to be MM!Link but if he and TP!Link are both meant to be the same person as carriers of the Hero’s Soul then that should be impossible, right? 

Wrong! 

It works if one uses the idea that the Soul of the Hero is meant to be the template that fashions “Link”. I am fully of the HC belief that just like Zelda originates from Hylia and Ganondorf originates from Demise, that ‘Link’ originates from the Fierce Deity/Kishin. The way I see it, the Hero’s Soul is meant to be a snake and each ‘life’ it lives is the skin it sheds once over. In the case of the Hero’s Shade and TP!Link it’s that said ‘skin’ had too much baggage to dissolve into the ether, to which happens once his ‘regrets are resolved’, as the others before it had. That could be what happens in BotW and TotK. Zelda’s body and soul have been separated in both games (if differently) if you think about it, so her acting as Hylia once in the Spirit Realm or what-have-you wouldn’t be all that implausible, if I may say so.

It’s just that various people, in life and fiction, have made mention that the more one Believes in something the more power it has. So, the whole thing where, in previous games, the Divinity/Religion/Lore of Hyrule had Three Golden Goddesses who created the world before SS messed with it by adding Hylia as a Lesser Goddess, as the original Guardian/Protector of the Triforce before she gave up her Divinity to reincarnate as a mortal alongside Her Hero, a Goddess who had apparently been there practically from the beginning and been forgotten until some point before BotW where she seems to be the only Goddess known to be worshiped by almost everyone in Hyrule is so sad. Hell, the Temple of Time, the biggest building on the Great Plateau even Before Calamity, has Her statue while the other buildings, as seen in AoC, only have pews even though they’re meant to be dedicated to said Golden Goddesses. The Goddesses that’re supposed to be above Hylia; maybe even created her as they created the Triforce and Hyrule.

All that aside, one has to ask: with there being Zelda's named every frickin' generation of the Royal Family, if not every female member and middle names used to differentiate who's who, then how does one find the one meant to be the Princess of Destiny? Especially if the Hero hasn't been found quite yet to say she'll be needed to fight alongside him or vise-versa, so to speak? Like, if the Queen had no problem manifesting her Power then why/how did she die before she could teach Zelda? Why did Zelda live if her Mother hadn't? I believe that, just like Link, Zelda also reincarnates and thus provided just a bit of Special Protection that works like Divine Providence. It's just that, unlike Link who only needs a proper vessel that can handle the Hero's Soul (because I'm of the HC opinion that it's said Soul that makes him and his blood special, not that he's descendant from a Special or Specific Line {not always a Knight's legacy/his own descendant}; the Sword is just meant to be physical proof of it) and what it'll have to go through, her reincarnation is meant to be through successive descendants. Her Line has to continue unless they don't want Hylia to reincarnate again to help her Hero when the Curse of Hatred manifests/rears its ugly head again. I say this because of how the Curse has been structured, "Those who share the blood of the goddess and the spirit of the hero..." which implies that it's a Goddess Descendant, or at least SS!Zelda's Descendant for those who're of the opinion that Hylia returned to her role as a Guardian Goddess once her current Mortal body perished (I don't agree to such, mind you, but that's just my opinion), and a person with the Hero's Spirit, absolutely no mention whatsoever of there being a blood connection between said Soul/Spirit's successor and predecessor just that the person who faces him has said Soul/Spirit, that'll face his Curse alongside one another eventually.

Because as fun as it is seeing authors attempting to make connections on how the Hero's Bloodline might've continued so that he'd reincarnate into his own Bloodline too, or at least for those who want to do a kinda angsty aside/bit for their story when said Bloodline 'perishes' or what-have-you, ("Forest of Ghosts" by Seren_Knight01 over on Ao3 is a good example) it's also kinda stupid because of how the Timeline Split goes. It sorta-kinda works for WW because of the plot point of 'Hero didn't come back' and 'Master Sword has lost its Power to Repel Evil because the Soul she's attached to has become non-existent due to the Sage of Time sending him back'. But then the same problem exists for the 'Hero Perishes' Branch. When would he have had time to sire a child? Granted, one could say 'one of his Blood but somewhere to the side' but unless that same or similar relative(s) had all been killed off in the 'Hero's Victorious' Branch it still makes it not make sense. As such, my opinion is that the Hero's Soul/Spirit is not bound to his own Line.

As it is, I have a kinda HC/Story Idea on how being the Hero is more than just being Hyrule's Saviour, at least when it comes to the Princess of Destiny, that could work for those who like the idea of Zelda and Link being SoulMates like me. It should be in my Story Idea tag mentioning Kirin/Qirin in the title if you'd like to look for inspiration for a story. Don't have to if you don't want to though. :)

All that aside, what do you think? Did anything not make sense?

[shallowseeker]

About 1x07 Reflections...

MILLIE: I can't lose him the way I did Henry. ADA: John isn't closed off the way Henry was.

Ahhhh, Henry. A lot idealistic, a lot duty-driven... and by all accounts a little closed off emotionally.

///

MILLIE: I could always read your dad's writing because I knew the context... Shopping lists, bills paid... Love letters.

So, while we-the-audience see evidence in SPNprime of Henry's devotion and love, especially in how he talks to his co-workers about Millie and John, to his actual loved ones and close friends, Henry could be, quite literally, "hard to read." ///

MILLIE: You're kidding, right? Your father's chicken scratch is the key to saving the world?

That sounds like "pierce thought the veil of death and save the day" kinda love, hehe.

///

Anyway.

There was a breakdown in Milli and Henry’s communication.

After their fight about his frankly dangerous and soul-sucking career, Millie thought Henry walked out on her for good, that he fell out of love with her and never came back.

She was confused. She was heartbroken. She couldn’t believe than the man she loved would do that!

He not only didn’t come back for her, but he didn’t come back for John. Not even for John!

SPNwin is her journey to peace, both in understanding more completely the principles of protection that perpetually motivated Henry. (SEE: the protective jasmine on her shop; she left it there because she still loves him; it grows despite death, kinda like a Leviathan blossom). She finds out that his leaving wasn't so simple as rejection, that he loved her and John all along.

But it was actually more heartbreaking. He didn't just leave her. He died. All this time, her brain wouldn’t go there. Rejection, as painful as it was, was less painful than entertaining the possibility of his death.

She's making peace with so much of her life.

All she ever wanted was for her loved ones to stay. To get a chance to be together as a family. “It’s time together that matters.”

///

But when Henry shows up briefly as a ghost in SPNwin, Millie is struck speechless...

MILLIE: Henry... HENRY: Millie. Know that I love you. Both of you. MILLE: (stares, nodding slowly, speechless)

Back in 1x02, she said this:

MILLLIE: But your dad and I had this rule. Whenever we fought, no matter how bad it got, we had to find a way to tell each other after, "I love you". And we followed our rule that day and... and you can tell. The last fight we had, the day he walked out the door, you know what neither of us stopped to tell each other? (regretful look to John) We're always gonna have our fights and I'm always gonna worry about (you) my baby, but I am never gonna let you walk out that door again without telling you I love you.

Perhaps after seeing Henry's ghost she regretted not saying aloud, "I love you."

But on closer inspection, she says "find a way to tell each other." So, perhaps that, while Henry was prone to love letters/poetry/grand gestures of love and duty (i.e. his idealistic choice of MoL work), Millie may have told him in other ways. Through care, small acts, or nonverbal cues.

Like in the goodbye scene. With her eyes. The subtle nod.

I think he can read her. Like she can read him (and his terrible chicken scratch writing).

[vethbrenatto]

Curious what your thoughts are on critical role season 3/campaign 3 continuing to bring back previously main characters from 1&2?

Idk I’m having a hard time with this campaign and the way the party seems to have badly analysis paralysis and it seems so dragged out with the characters not wanting to make decisions.

So when I see that they keep bringing pre established characters in for the story instead of focusing on things NOW, I’m a bit exasperated lol. I’m glad they’re having fun and it does make for some good moments! But I’m just feeling bleh overall atm

i actually stopped watching c3 somewhere in the 90s so i can't really comment-

what i can say is that this is not a storytelling device i particularly enjoy; it particularly bugged me early in c3 with the intervention of vex and keyleth and even pike (my girl, my love, my light) as these sort of god-like deus ex machina figures. i have a lot of old posts detailing why i didn't like it then, but a lot of it is sort of a stakes thing, right? vox machina and m9 have saved and saved the world... what the fuck is bells hells even qualified for in comparison? why not just let the professionals handle it (story, that's why)?

and then we get this sort of culmination that i've heard about recently where the cast has been swapping between parties and conceptually that's really cool, even if it doesn't appeal to me.

what it comes down to is that this is matt's vision for the world- an interconnecting web of events and people. in my ideal version, the world is an expansive place and these are 3 equally important but unconnected stories. set in the same place but never directly connecting- just some little overlap to remind you it's all in the same place (i.e. the allura cameo in the m9 campaign). but, quite simply, that isn't what matt or the cast want.

i am interested to see if this will be the last campaign for the main cast, or the last exandria campaign overall because the plot does seem so dramatic and "it all connects/comes together" that i have no clue where they could go from here.

c3 overall was hard for me to connect to since the mid campaign (i also think watching CR live is probably my least favorite way of consuming it- i do think the content works better on a binge) but maybe ill catch up at some point.

TLDR; i am not currently watching but agree that the return of past characters doesn't appeal to me specifically, though i know the fandom and the cast probably have the opposite opinion about the returns.

[mochiotomedumplings]

2.7 rants and more sunturine parallels in penacony

theres just so much to talk about 2.7… i mean just anything spoken by sunday. when wonweek said:

did you lose your mind after being run over by the Express, or were you possessed by that IPC gambler ?

sunturine implications aside, sunday replied to it with:

to save more lives, you must first understood what they live for and what they die for

i wonder if the parallel is intentional - that when he said “failure is the best teacher” followed by the above it meant, his loss against the express taught him what they live for, and his loss against aventurine taught him what the gambler (would) die for.

sunturine and penacony, the same no matter where i go

after penacony, sunday woke up from the dream, then upon re-entering severed his halo to remind himself of the pain of “being awake” and on the ground. finally “living” like everyone else, struggling with the unknowns and not being trapped by something that isn’t “his true heart”, having to embrace what he once hated.

(it's interesting that while the harmony and wonweek were framed as things he dislikes/ detests, discord and possibilities - symbolizing aven - were described as what his past self would not have tolerated, yet was the first thing he jumped to changing about himself)

i like that altho theres not much of it, we do see bits of his more “rebellious” self in 2.7 and 3.x as compared to early 2.x where he was 199% wrapped in his titles and duties. that instead of enacting “his” will upon the world as the family head/ conductor of ena’s dream, he can now just stand on the side and observe instead, as just another person.

2.7 while not touching on the details showed a lot about sunday just by merit of having him talk a lot to someone who later turned out to be himself... a rather cryptic reflection. we have a bit that hinted at how “order” wasn’t what sunday, the real him that’s buried under all those duties before his fall, wanted which suggests his insistence on an all-out battle was for someone to beat it out of him:

then this time, my true heart will guide the tuning

he said that his stance on Harmony remains the same aka he still doesn’t agree, but the implication is that he can face things as “himself�� now unlike before when he didn’t/ couldn’t.

only then will i truly be able to walk among the living

from the quest descriptions, his farewell journey is him looking back at the past, everything thats happened till now, before he can move forward. some of the descriptions have quite meaningful implication, and sunday’s own speeches are just 😭 he’s so philosophical in every way i love it.

“looking back” is also confronting “all that i detest” - including the him of yesterday who made mistakes, the failures themselves, parts of himself he could’ve been but would never be now. and this also includes accepting other things he hate - unknown variables in reality, what hes scared of, embracing the unknown world like everyone else does - probably why he thinks he only deserve to be among the “living” / awake if he can accept all that he hates & fears (facing reality like normal people) (only then can he change and move on, embracing what past him couldnt accept i.e. harmony).

echoes of the past need not go away, but follow to the stars - i think part of the message in sunday’s “looking back” is that he won’t completely change nor cast away himself, and his dream remains the same despite how impossible-sounding it is, yet he will reach for it like everyone else in the mortal world.

he talked about how one’s starting point is also their last stop - his farewell to the past and sweet dream and is also where his new self & journey begins.

its interesting how the first change he went for was employing uncertainty in his plan - leaving the result of the tuning to fate (instead of controlling the result like what his old self would have done). the allusion to a coin flip and even his last line in the boss fight "the time has come, let it be revealed", sunday’s tuning is framed as a gamble and pointing to aven as the only possible influence.

aven’s methodology - practically his identity - was sunday’s first most visible change he made as his new self. his loss to aven was something he remembered so closely, and the change was so integrally out of character for him that wonweek had to point it out.

its kinda funny how his entire farewell has so much to do with luck & fate - meeting the pepeshi with the prank candy, picking the route with the most guards, running into welt, finding robin, final tuning was also a bet. a trip with a lot of variables, completely opposite to his usual m.o. - showing how he’s really aven’s contrast in terms of methodology & vibes i.e. control vs risks.

wow there is so much parallel btw 2.7 and aven’s quest ? not gonna deep dive aven’s quest for now but what i could recall, they both looked over their past, walked to a stage and went through a bet on their own life, and both gave a farewell to their past self, along with a promise to see their sister again. it is uncanny, the similarity in what they went through. what sunday said, the end is the beginning - he retraced his past to his “end”, where he failed and lost everything and was then symbolically reborn anew - be born as a human and die as one.

same as aven, who retraced his past to his own “end”, where he won the bet and almost died, throwing himself into nihility abyss but in the end finding peace with his past and some will to live on - the ending narration gave the sense that he was dying as his bet came to an end but his words showed that he was not gonna die.

look back then move forward, the only thing a person can do in life - here they share this theme of coming to an end, looking back and saying goodbye to the past, and moving forward with something new - new identity for sunday, new purpose for aven.

when i found this part in aven’s quest of his sister’s final words to him, there’s even more damning parallels:

so, run, kakavasha

-> being given chance to live by his sister & having to part

don’t be afraid, don’t look back

-> mention of fear of what’s ahead, and “looking back”

our paths will cross again beneath the auroras

-> siblings reunite under the stars… initially sunday & robin were doomed for “eternal” separation

farewell, kakavasha

the quest is a farewell, saying goodbye to one’s past… to one's family.

sunday & aven both fear “life” in a way, and their quest both end with them going towards it with a gamble - sunday with the tuning before he starts his journey, and aven with the trip into the abyss before he continues living but not trying to die this time, finding meaning before the inevitable end.

cool to note how sunday was order which falls under harmony and aven was putting on a “collaborative” performance (ref his eidolons and all the games where ppl have to cooperate to win). they have different ways about it but end result is remarkably similar.

also the steps “meet with robin” and “‘this is where we go our own way’” have some interesting parallels and contrasts. descriptions for both have a similar feeling, both telling sunday/aven to say their farewell and have no regrets. both quests feature their respective farewells to their sister, with the difference being telling sunday to “take his time” but aven had to “run” past it, memories passing by.

this is due to the different context - sunday allowed himself to see robin under a disguise only and aven was running so he could die and reunite with his family.

(aven’s quest was in such a way that it’s like him reliving his entire life before his “death”, while sunday had a reminiscing talk with robin disguised as a casual chat - had reference to their childhood promise and also what sunday went through in penacony till that point)

both highlighted their desire to be with their family again, and how their family is a big part of who they are (ref 2.7 step description on robin being “the most weighty part of that identity”) - sunday unable to show himself to robin both to protect her and also unable to face her, and aven finding the will to live to make his family proud when they meet again.

both quest steps feature a farewell that’s also a well wish for the start of a journey - kakavasha to live on, sunday to go on his journey. there are so many symbolic similarities between their quest… and one last thing to end off this massive tangent of a brainrot: their boss lines.

aven’s "let the game begin" shows his most comfortable “tool” to get what he wants aka games.

sunday’s "tuning yourself" shows what he does most too - smoothing out “dissonant sounds”/“disorderly noises”.

this it the contrast in their style - one brings others into explosive games where it seems like luck and fighting each other and one brings others into order & harmony… it seems contrasting but eventually has the same goal of pulling others where they want.

aven’s "so long as people still have hope, they’ll keep throwing money" and sunday’s "echoes of the past, you need not fade away" despite the different vibes, are talking about “hope” in different forms (ref sunday not giving up his past dream of building a paradise, and one day seeing robin again).

aven’s "why can’t i be happy too ? why can’t i feel that free" is not linked to 2.7 boss line but rather old sunday's boss line "if you are born weak, which god should you turn to for solace".

aven is not “weak” in the typical way, but sunday’s “weak” referred to those who are hopeless, without a future, who does not know where and how to seek happiness. this is where he was the prime target for sunday’s “paradise”.

and sunday’s 2.7 line "the time has come. let it be revealed… is it inevitable for me" is yet another reference to aven, that the whole battle/ tuning is a gamble where sunday will probably win anyway (like how aven always ends up winning) but is a bet, whether in the process sunday can “accept” wonweek and truly change, or is it “inevitable” (that he won’t change, or maybe him being the one allowed to exist isn’t a “foregone conclusion”) (also alludes to the idea of an inevitable ending but the process changes the meaning).

a bet with his life, after which is “departure” - mirroring aven’s “get going” into the void.

theres seriously way too many parallels… i initially reread 2.7 dialogue bcs i wanted to check out this contrast between the two of them - if we consider only penacony main quest, aven’s story was mostly about himself and his “death” and going past that while sunday’s part was more explicitly on what he thinks about helping people and saving the world (self destruction vs world saving). then 2.7 ended up being such a big parallel to aven’s quest… but we had little clue what went on in sunday’s head as he reflected on the past unlike aven’s future and past selves (wonweek is also not quite sunday and also did not reveal that much).

we got to live through bits of aven’s past but could only deduce bits n pieces of sunday… who gave his farewell then moved on, starting his journey anew with a self that’s not entirely different but not the same either… just like aven trying to find meaning in human life before one day reuniting with his family.

if we consider sunday’s full story to be penacony + 2.7… its really his style to express so little of himself and his feelings. aven also lives under masks and masks, but his story exposed some of his deepest feelings and most traumatic moments… like how he bets his life, all or nothing in every gamble.

sunday really flayed him open, no wonder aven couldn’t deal with sunday in the voicelines when he could handle even jade 😂

they're so similar yet also contrasting in many ways... both putting up facades but one is of calmness & control and one is of extravagance & danger. aspects of themselves like discipline & ascetism vs desire for happiness & lavish indulgence and under the mask, hope to save the world vs having no reason to live on.

they both chose to “die” and then both have to “live” for real now - despite everything, one continues to try to save the world and one continues to try to live on. the one who wants to make others happy and the one who wants to be happy.

once again, two sides of same coin, two parts of destiny - creation & destruction, absolute vs uncertainty, fulfillment & loss and how they seem like yin yang contrast but one and the same.

contrasting, yet so uncannily similar 🙏

[f1a1w1n]

No, you don't

Part 7

Summary: Drunk confessions.

Warnings: none

Authors note:

Heyyy... hey... how ya'll doin?

omg guess who's back? I has someone request for some more angst like ages ago and I never got around to it (so sorry) and I couldn't find their request so whoever you are this is for you *gives you a sloppy forehead kiss* BUT I will eventually get around to whatever u request so...

Enjoy

~

‘Kreeds kavern for kanacious kanacoids and other members of the galaxy’

That's what the sign for the pub said. So so so many ‘k’s.  

The loud rumbling of chatter, glasses clinking, and music pumping from the speakers cast an ambience over the bar. I nurse a short drink of some amber liquid - whatever it is, it drowns the sound of droid fighting out. I wave the bartender over, a sour look comes over his face as he grumbles over.

“Hey, could I get another-” Before I can finish my sentence, the bartender slams down a whole bottle on the counter. “Okay thanks…” 

We decided to stay in the bar longer - we, as in mainly Poe. I swirl the liquid around in my glass as I glance over at Poe. He’s decided to take the most socially conversational seat in the house, i.e. the furthest seat from me. On the other side of the bar. Alone. 

I place down my drink. “Ready to go?” I semi yell over the chatter of the room. His eyes barely flick towards me, he smirks and says, “Why? Can’t handle drinking sweetheart?” He shakes his head and down another shot of some hard liquor. 

It's sad really. 

“Okay that’s enough.” I hop off my bar stool and meander over to Poe’s side of the bar, bottle in hand. “Drunk enough to tell me what’s going on?”

“Not nearly enough.” Poe half laughs as he snatches the bottle out of my hand and pours himself a shot. 

“Okay buddy.” I pry the bottle from Poe’s warm fingers. He peers up at me with big brown glossy eyes. His hair sticks to his forehead, he smiles half heartedly. 

“What are you doing? You’re messing up our whole dynamic. We’re supposed to hate each other enthusiastically, remember? How am I supposed to hate you when you’re drunk? That gives you an advantage.” I say.

“It gives me an advantage.” Poe repeats, hiccuping on the last word. 

“Yes.” I say.

“Who said I hate you?” Poe straightens and stands up, looking down on me. He crosses his arms, flexing his forearm muscles. 

“Seriously? Your whole vibe,” I laugh. “From day one you’ve quite literally treated me like the gum on the bottom of your shoe. You wouldn’t let me save Rey, you wouldn’t even talk to me, you didn’t even want to go on this mission!”

Poe frowns, but lets me talk.

“You’d rather run cargo than escort me to a desert planet,” I sit on the bar stool, taking a swig of my drink. “And you’ve made yourself very very drunk - to drown my presence out I imagine.” 

Poe sits back down. “I don’t hate you.”

I scoff. “Yeah right.” I grin through the rim of my drink. “In case you forgot, you called me ‘sith equivalent’.”

Poe groans and slumps forward on the table. “I didn’t mean that.” 

He’s a horrible liar.

“Oh, I think you did.” I say, fighting back the anger rising in my voice. I could feel the heat rising to my cheeks, and suddenly the bar was too stuffy.

Suddenly, Poe grabs me by the elbow and drags me to a dark corner of the pub, behind two sandy pillars plastered in posters. “What?-” I protest. 

He angles his body in front of me. Inescapable. His dark eyes lower to mine and I can feel the heat radiating from him. A thin layer of sweat sticks to his forehead, as his glassy eyes stick to mine. “I don’t hate you.” His eyes bore into mine and he refuses to release his grip on my elbow. I can’t escape him, but I can escape his piercing gaze. I turn my eyes anywhere, everywhere except for his face. Poe murmurs my name quietly. “I don’t hate you.” 

I look down. “Let go please.”. My voice cracks softly, threatening to express emotion. Not here I think, not in front of him!

Poe’s face crumples into some expression - whatever it is I can’t read it, or more likely I don’t want to. I can’t look at him, I can’t stand him.

I tear my elbow from his grip and run up the stairs. I run up the stairs and burst open the doors. Warm fresh air hits my face. The night sky of Jakku, a rich shade of dark blue.

Maybe I should just stay here. 

I’m caught up in my thoughts. 

I hate Poe. 

No, you don’t. 

I hate him, I hate him so much. I hate his wandering eyes, I hate how confident he is. I hate the way I feel around him. I hate that he hates me, and I hate that I hate him. And now he’s telling me he doesn’t hate me?

I’m just gonna get through this mission and I’ll steal a starfighter or something. Leave Rey, leave Finn, leave the rebellion alone, and most importantly leave Poe. I don’t care, it's not my fight in the first place. My fight was before my time and I’ve already paid for it, with something that wasn’t my choice. 

I tighten my scarf around my head and make for the exit of the markets, then suddenly, a cold strong hand grips my arm. 

Poe? I think foolishly.

I look up. White armour. The armour that makes your skin crawl. The armour that makes you cower. Before I can react, more hands grasp me and I can’t move. 

The force you idiot.

But before I can do that, a sharp pain sticks me in the side of the neck. I see a stormtrooper pull away with a long thin needle. My head goes foggy, thoughts swirling like sticky honey, and the one person I can think about as my eyelids droop?

Poe. 

Masterlist

If you want to be tagged, or recommend anything, fill this out. 

@kingtwhiddleston @lovepeaceorelse @hunitweet @spderm4n @angie2274 @coffeesimp @capedcods@kurtsmellsliketeenspiritt @just3rowsing @nuwanda-greaser  @nightmonkeysstuff @Jeong-uwu

[transrevolutions]

got any Marius headcanons? also I promise the college AU will be out in like a week

god this is so incredibly late I'm so sorry. with that being said:

(these are modern au, I'm in that kind of mood rn)

-marius likes classical music more than any other genre. he enjoys going to local orchestra concerts.

-marius and enjolras are actually really good friends, especially once marius has been around courfeyrac/the rest of the abc enough to get some Coherent Political Stances. they don't see eye to eye 100% of the time but they always have interesting conversations over coffee. autism-to-autism communication, etc.

-he's the sole Token Straight of the abc/abc adjacent folks (I'm sorry bi marius enjoyers, I see you, for me he just exudes confused ally token straight vibes. he has two gfs tho if that counts).

-on the subject of the two girlfriends: in my head there is a very funny dynamic where, at least to start, marius has a massive crush on cosette, who has a massive crush on eponine, who has a massive crush on... marius. this goes on for quite some time before any of them actually realize.

-he's generally a very stay-off-to-the-side, let-others-take-the-lead sort of person, except for some very specific moments where there'll be some sort of crisis and he'll just. come up with the wildest fucking idea that somehow ends up working (i.e. canon era blowing up the barricade). if enjolras has "occasional outbursts of eloquence", marius has occasional outbursts of tactical brilliance.

-he's on the prelaw track. bahorel (ex-law student from way back when, hates the subject on principle), bossuet (in a casual situationship with the idea of being a lawyer), and courfeyrac (almost did law school but last-minute switched to education and never looked back) constantly bother and tease him about it.

-one time very early on he was at a small rally and struck up a long and cordial-ish conversation with javert. enjolras rarely gets visibly angry with marius (he saves it for The System), but he just about bit his head off that time. (for context: do not fucking talk to cops, and especially not at a protest.)

-harbored some not-so-great preconceived notions about criminals/the justice system that were leftovers from being raised by his grandfather. this ended up being a sticking point in his relationship with cosette (valjean being her dad and an ex-con) and with eponine (career criminal parents). eventually comes around on this matter, but it takes a while.

I actually had a lot of fun making these! thanks for the ask!

[crayistic]

FF7 Rebirth Ending Theory ahead so Spoilers!

This is your last chance..... be carful.... I'm deep diving into theory's here lol

- 3

- 2

- 1

- OK!

So i had to get this out of my brain somewhere and this is the best place I could think of. I have been wreaking my brain trying to get my head around a quite confusing ending however I think i have finally settled on what I'm going to believe. Feel free to have your own opinions or questions! All respect and love from over here. =]

I'm working of the fact that there is multiple worlds being created every time the original plan (I.e original game runs) is challenged or changed. So this would mean there is a timeliness running and every time it does its supposed to be a set story but at some point sephiroth got wind of this and challenged fate because he was sick of loosing. Doing this brought the whispers to try and stop him fucking with fate, them themselves also then impacting in someway just for being present.

So far I think we have seen 6 worlds be created. - the one we are in, playing from remake. Being our world. (World 1)

-the one created when we fought the whispers changing fate meaning zack was then saved. (Say world 2), this is the world where he goes after hojo to save cloud.

-2 other worlds are then created one going after biggs and the bomb (world 3) and one where he is outside of the church that sephiroth turns up outside of (world 4)

-one world where aerith and cloud go on their date (world 5)

-and finally one cloud creates when he manages to hit sephiroths sword away from Aerith. (World 6, the only one we dont see a differnt stamp yet)

(It's good to note here that at points where worlds are "created" there seems to be some sort of rainbow effect that happens around them. Examples, Tunnel in the train station, Aerith when she pushes cloud into the portal, zack when he falls through floors into the portal, cloud when he hits sephiroths sword)

We have confermations of atleast 5 worlds by the fact that we see atleast 5 differnt stamp dogs In differnt scenes. However it us also possible that there are more worlds. Each world destiny is to have sephiroth try to destroy it, however he is supposed to be foiled by cloud and the gang minus aerith. However if anything is different, such as tifa, barret and red being dead and aerith and cloud being unconscious then clearly they are not there to defeat him in that world resulting in it being destroyed.

(Side note... the rip in the sky im undecided on if this is a result of multiple worlds, a world that has been changed from the original or if it means the inevitable of its end. Though it would make sence if it is a change present in that world as cloud now has knowledge he didn't before and has been in or is from another world. Also maybe why the others can't see it... but again still quite unsure)

So, I believe when cloud in our world fell with aerith, she herself was saved by him taking the brunt of the fall. I think he was knocked out and then woken up or was pulled into another world were a differnt aerith was waiting for him who knew he would need her holy. We know our cloud is capable of either hearing or seeing some of the other world/s through the fact that he goes to sleep and seems to be connected for a brief moment somehow. In this world he wakes up in, aerith is there with her ribbon in her hair waiting for him. I say this because it's easy to assume he wakes up in the world (world 2) we have been flipping back and forth from as zack but I don't think it is as zack leaves with aeriths ribbon, but also the stamp dog that is present behind him when he is on the train track is a differnt stamp dog that is present when aerith and cloud are on their date after he wakes up in that world world 5). I also think its a differnt world (world 4) to the one where zack is sat outside the church as jonny walks by with again a differnt stamp plush.

When cloud is then pushed into a portal he at first he lands somewhere where he is attacked by whispers. Assuming this is trying to stop him from handing the white materia back to aerith. After the fight he is greeted by one aerith saying we'll we meet again... as if she hadn't just seen him a moment ago. She seems to keep appearing and reappearing from behind trees. I believe these are multiple aeriths from differnt worlds and the one he gives the white materia to is our (world one) aerith, as when she dies we see the materia fall and it is in fact not empty like it had been before.

He then returns to our world (world 1) Ok so now stay with me here... I think at this point this cloud is actually two clouds in one, from world one and world 4. If you remember Marlene saying to zack that he has to make cloud better. She talks about how he trys to save her but doesn't make it in time to zack has to make him better so he can wake up and save aerith. So with this, we then see the scene where aerith is about to die and side by side we see two differnt fates play out. One where he doesn't save her and one where he does. Again we also see the rainbow effect when he knocked sephiroths sword away. We don't see just one outcome, we see them overlap as if they are happening at the same time. This is why I think there could be the presence of two clouds. With aerith being saved this created a new world (world 6).

We know it's possible to have people jump worlds as seen by zack for sure after he fights with cloud back to back. Possibly with aerith also where she was given the white materia. We know there is a theory of worlds merging and coming apart from things sephiroth says aswell as zack the last time we see him. I think the aerith that comes to help cloud fight sephiroth is our aeriths spirit (as she fades away at the end similar to the life force of the plannet) and I think the aerith we see at the end is in fact the one that was saved when cloud deflected the sword. Its possible he can see her because the line between worlds is thin for him after being through the portal and so on. The same with when aerith touches red and he seems to be able to feel her presence. Maybe the reason cloud can see the rip in the sky is also something to do with the lines between worlds being blured for him and why the others can't see it.

It's also possible that is wasn't two clouds and that it was just one, that created another world by saving aerith.. but it makes more sence to me that there would be two as how could one cloud create two possibilities. Unless what was happening was... and again stay with me haha

Maybe our cloud isn't the only cloud we see. We assume it is because we play as him but what if we are just seeing two worlds at once crossing over eachother that is happening at the same time. I'm not sure... but i do think it's in the ball park of either or theory's I have.

Obviously there are holes here and there in every theory because square enix have made is impossibly complicated lol however I still love it and I'm loving the changes and possibilities.

I do think the third game will be focusing on stoping sephiroth and whatever he has planned while joining all of the worlds together again. I do think they plan on having atleast aerith survive somehow this time, I'm hoping for zack to. Either way, I have absolutely loved playing final fantasy VII rebirth, the story, characters, side missions, music, visuals... all of it was fantastic and I can not wait for the end installment. I know there is alot of og fans (me being one of the og fans also) that are disappointed that its not a direct remake but I can say I am not one of them. I think the way that have done this is so clever to also make sure the original was cannon and did also happen and I'm also excited when im playing and see something that is new or different. It gives me something to look forward to with also anxiety of not actually knowing what the outcome will be now.

Anyway, time for me to continue with my post game blues after my 100 hour plus game play! If you read all of my rambles, thanks for sticking around and I hope you have had an awesome day/night.

[notesfromthepalace]

Some Things are Not for Tea Time

My Father once said "... people will hate you [and be jealous of you] because they see you with a new nail set every week, not knowing you do your own nails at home to save money".

Let me explain:

What my Father was trying to convey is people will dislike you over the smallest things i.e. like me doing my nails on my own every Saturday morning to save money (back in my college days), but jealously having an effect on their perception; "Oh she has so much money she gets her nails done every week" - then going into the rabbit hole of assumptions just because they are choosing to dislike me.

Again, as I always say, this blog is for the girls who get it, because if you don't, the first two paragraphs will go right over your head (if it hasn't already) and you will be lost in the sauce the entirety of this blog post.

But for the girlies who get it: the nice, mind your business, your man and money type of girls who stay prayed up but don't tempt me to jump because "knuck if you buck".

Yes, you darling!|

Hey friend!

So, just to be clear, if you did not know: not every woman who smiles in your face is your friend, and not every compliment comes from a place of being genuine.

That being said, not every woman you have conversations with should be privy to every good thing that happens in your life - to include your plans for the future.

I believe I have touched on this subject before but the more and more I vet my social circle and distance myself from certain people, the more and more apparent how important it is to safe guard the things that are so precious me.

Story Time! *Mariah Carey voice

Over the last few months, I have received a vast amount of good news and there have been new things, new investments, and new moves. But recently, certain people have been reaching out to me to inquire about my whereabouts, my love life and so on.

To be quite frank, it is none of their business.

So myself and my African Prince have gone for holiday in Times Square, met each other's close families and friends and have started to move as one - 2024 is going to be a movie (if you know what I mean).

God has been really great to me and through prayer, and learning to be more discreet with what I am working towards, my dreams and visions are coming to fruition. For example, last year I bought my first pair of Christian Louboutin heels:

I didn't do a "show-in-tell" or an unboxing. No tea no shade to people who do that, I just chose not to. I wore the hell out of these shoes though! The photo above is from my Ghanian Sweetheart taking me to The W in Bellevue for date night. But when I bought the first pair, I told myself that I would have the pumps, this time next year - it's this time next year, is it not?

My African King was literally in my mind. He got me the very shoes that I told myself I would have by December 2023!

There was a time I was doing hair and make-up on the side for some extra money. I'm aware that there are plenty of girls who had my address who may not be the finest company. So I didn't want to post the nice things I had or the nice things my man would do for me before someone tries to rob me - jealous people do that.

I am currently enjoying the Christmas Holiday with my man in our home away from the city and during this time of love and bliss, I received a call from a girl I used to be close with.

She called me on FaceTime - in tears (and inebriated) asking why we don't hangout, how come she doesn't know what's going on in my life, why I don't call her; Then goes on to insult the girls I do hangout with like "you only hang out with your boujie friends, yeah I saw that you went to the Powder Room" - like yeah I did go to the Powder Room (very nice restaurant by the way) because I was invited by a friend to go. Like I have said in previous posts, I frequent high-end establishments all of the time.

Don't get me wrong, a part of me felt bad bad because I genuinely like and care for the girl. But as I was evolving, she would ridicule the changes that she saw and insinuate that I was acting like I was better than her or the other girls we used to go out with.

To put things into perspective, she and I started hanging out when I dumped my ex. And I remember I called her on a Saturday morning and she was surprised, like "What, you're calling to go out with us tonight? We always ask you to come out and you say 'no'".

She was right, I would typically say no, but I didn't want to be one of those girls who sits in their flat and cries because they just went through a breakup. I was ready to go to the club and just be out. I needed to take my mind off of the hurt. So we went to club that night.

But, in my typical Sarah Chanel fashion, I got tired of the club quick. I don't mind it from time to time, in a section with my girlies from back home. But I remember the last time we went to the club, she got kicked out for being drunk and disorderly.

I was low-key cool off the entire situation. I was also going through my own personal evolution and changing what I do, how eat, the places I frequent - just for her to ridicule the changes. That was another reason why I distanced myself. As a friend, I wasn't asking her to do the things I was doing or to change herself; I would've loved her support though. My best friend and I have been friends of over a decade and when I would talk to her about taking my walk with God more seriously, she didn't make me feel bad for it or act weird, even as a person like herself who isn't extremely religious - she supported me from afar, so I know it's not impossible or an extreme ask.

Not to mention she would put me in compromising positions like trying to hook me up with a man that she knew was in a fully committed relationship with another woman, or acting a complete fool in a restaurant and yelling at the waiter.

So naturally I distanced myself. And to be fair, she's not the only person I distanced myself from. Over these last two years, I have seen so much change in my outlook on life, my spiritual life and walk with God, my ideas and interests, my love life and so on.

I am also of the understanding that everyone you meet can not go on your journey, especially if they choose to remain in the same place mentally, that they were in back in 2022 - we are on the brink of 2024, become anew.

Take tips from my blog, it'll help.

And I don't say that to be a mean girl.

I want to see all women, especially young women of color evolve and be of their higher selves. But I can't make the horse drink the water if it doesn't even want to come to the well.

With less than a week left in 2023, leave the need of giving everyone an explanation in 2023 - ITS NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS!

For the girlies who have already been living their lives in luxe and love, keep doing it.

But for the girls who don't know where to start, sissy pooh, start at Notes From the Palace. And will it be lonely someone times, yes. Will your character be questioned by people that you thought were your friends, yes. But will the grass be greener on the other side, YES!

Happy New Year and I pray all of my readers, even the low key haters have a year of prosperity, peace, love and money

With Love,

Sarah Chanel

P.S.

You see that shoe! I almost forgot the most important part. Walk with Jesus, for real. And I will be walking right along our Lord and Father Jesus Christ for the rest of my life because all of the great things I have obtained and will achieve are all in thanks to the Most High! Stay prayed up!

[literaticat]

Hi Jenn. Some time ago you had a post where you - and I'm paraphrasing - advised people to buy/read 10 or 20 (I think?) current books and really "rip them apart" - i.e. analyze them, study them - to help assist with their own writing/publishing goals, get to know the market, learn from the books what worked to get them published. These weren't the exact words. I've tried using the search function but can't find the post. Could you link to it or maybe give similar advice again please? Thank you.

Sure - I know I gave this advice *someplace* on here, and for sure on twitter, but since that website has gone to the dogs I'll just paste the thread below and save it in the FAQ.

The best advice I have if you want to write for kids is, GO TO THE LIBRARY AND READ 100 BOOKS PUBLISHED IN YOUR CATEGORY IN THE PAST FIVE YEARS. Put your favorites in a special pile and buy your own copies of those so you can write in them. Tear them apart. Why and HOW do they work?

If you do this: CONGRATULATIONS, you just did much of the work for a masters degree without having to pay for it. While you're at it - make a spreadsheet of those 100 books, noting WHO PUBLISHED THEM, and agent/editor if they are listed in the acknowledgements. Note patterns!

If you do THIS step: CONGRATULATIONS, you just got a crash course in publishing and are armed with the knowledge of "who publishes what" that you will need as you begin your querying/publishing journey.

Whenever I give this advice, some folks push back and complain about "having to" read lots of kids books (which, it's the best homework I can IMAGINE doing, and if you don't like reading them, maybe don't WRITE them!), or they think it is a waste of time or I'm being MEAN... I think it can actually SAVE you time flailing in the darkness, and I'm being nice.

But hey, if you don't like it: Ignore me! You don't need to fight me about it. Like... it's free advice and this is a free country. I promise that I don't care what you do or don't do. :-)

PS: I specify "published in the last five years" bc publishing trends change; if you are relying on knowledge of the kids books that were published when YOU were a kid as your main source, you limit yourself. What flew in the 1980s would not fly today, and vice-versa.

PPS: For everyone saying this is advice applicable to any genre or category: I know! But since I’m an expert about children’s books, I’ll speak on children’s books. If I said “all books” I promise there’d be adult book writers hollering at me in the comments and I’m not into it!

PPPS: (And before anyone comes for me: I can call myself an expert about children’s books because I literally AM ONE, after 30+ years in the field. That doesn’t mean I’m better than anyone else or that you have to take my advice. You do you!)

PPPPS: ("But Jennifer how can you have been in children’s books for 30+ years when you can’t be more than 29 years old?!” I hear you say. Haha well, first of all, I started quite young, as a bookseller. And also, there may be a damnéd portrait somewhere, I can say no more!)

/fin

(Somebody followed up after I posted this and asked me to expand on the "tearing books apart" piece - so I did. That's here, clickety click!)

[purplesurveys]

1995

Have you ever been to Las Vegas?   Nope.

What did you have for breakfast this morning? Just half of an egg sandwich. I was planning to eat loads for lunch since it was going to be my birthday eve celebration, so I intentionally didn't eat a lot for breakfast.

Do you have any loose change in your pocket?     In what's actually a pretty rare thing, I don't have pockets at the moment haha.

Do you like Taylor Swift?   Nope.

What’s your favorite Disney Channel movie?     High School Musical :)

If you met your favorite celebrity, would you be calm or star struck?     I mean I kinda met J-Hope and my reaction was everything I expected it to be: I couldn't look at him dead in the eye and I stayed frozen/mostly silent. LOL. That said, starstruck is the most accurate answer.

Are there any lights on in the room you’re in?     Yeah, my main light is turned on for a change. I don't want to fall asleep yet, so I need to keep everything bright.

What’s your favorite subject in school?  My favorite was always history. :) Though in my elementary years when history wasn't yet incorporated in my curriculum, I liked language best because it was just basic English grammar and vocab and gave me easy 100s.

What’s your favorite holiday?     New Year's! I like that it's not tied to religion lol, but also the 'fresh start' vibe it gives everybody. The parties are also always just so fun.

Do you ever have to do yard work?     The closest would be, like, having to pull out weeds in our backyard when we didn't have the place paved yet.

Is your school close to your house?     Idk how would you define close? I'd say it was, though -- speaking solely for where I went to college. It was like a good 6-7km away, which was bearable enough of a drive for me.

I can't really say the same for my elementary/high school, which was well on the other side of the city + it was a daily drive up a literal MOUNTAIN. The commute was admittedly draining, considering I did it 5 days a week, 14 years straight.

Speaking of school, how did you get there today?     I haven't been in school since 2020.

Do you think Bad Romance is a catchy song, or an annoying one?     SUCH a catchy, great song. It was very fresh for its time and it makes it easily understandable why Gaga just immediately blew up the way she did. To this day I'd mark out if I ever heard the song out in public, haha.

Are you currently using a laptop?     Yeah, I also exclusively use a laptop when taking these.

Do you have any live versions of songs in your music software?     I don't consume music like this anymore, i.e. buying or saving albums to have them in my library...I use Spotify where I can easily access the albums I want to listen to, including live ones.

Did/do you listen to Britney Spears songs?     I do listen to her sometimes especially if I turn on a 90s/00s playlist, but I don't think I've ever sought her out specifically.

Is it a windy day?     I mean there was wind here and there but all it did was blow hot and humid air our way. Not very helpful.

In the past week, have you ridden in a taxi?     No. It's been years since my last taxi ride in the Philippines. I did hail taxis a couple of times in Japan back in January, though. Mainly because I knew their drivers were going to be honest and polite and will not at all rip me off lol.

What shorthand do you use the most?     Quite a lot. lol, lmao, ngl, tbh, iykwim, icymi, fyi, fyr are just select ones I can think of off the top of my head, but I'm sure I use a few more.

Do you ever wish on stars at night?     Sometimes, if I'm feeling childlike/romantic.

What color are your eyes?   They're brown, but very dark brown that they nearly appear as black.

What album is the current song you’re listening to off of?     It's an album called Coup d'Etat, by G-Dragon. It's one of my favorites :) Not a single miss.

What are you doing after you finish this?     I'll continue trying to figure out what I can delete from my phone to free up storage. I'm already transferring gigabytes' worth of stuff at the moment to my Google Drive, but I do feel like this'll last me the entire evening (2:20 AM as we speak...) so I'm fully locked in.

Reason why I'm doing this is my mom surprised me with an Apple Watch just this midnight for my birthday, but apparently I can't link it to my phone unless I've had the latter updated to iOS 18 -- which I haven't been able to do because STORAGE and because I'm TERRIBLE at backing up my files. Anyway so now I'm like mass-transferring videos to my Drive and deleting 4 years' worth of photos I've been hoarding but never look at anyway and hoping this'll be enough. I'm SO excited about this fucking watch so I'm just frustrated that the surprise was a bit anticlimactic for me all because I'm LOCKED OUT FROM MY OWN WATCH HAHAHAHAHA

In your opinion, what song is the most overplayed right now?     For a very long time it was APT, so I'm glad that kind of stopped now. I don't think anything's super overplayed at the moment.

Are you in a band?     Nope.

How clean is your bedroom?     Enough for me not to feel antsy about it.

Is there a pen within reaching distance of you?     I don't think so, nope.

Are you sitting at a desk?     Yessir.

Does your favorite band have a male or female lead singer?   Female.

Do you normally shut your bedroom door before you go to sleep?     Yes, but then again my door is always closed as I prefer it to be.

Have you seen the movie Moulin Rouge?     No.

Would you ever dye your hair a different color?     I would and I have. I've gone with ash brown; then purple around 3 or 4 times at this point; then brown; then red. I'm definitely dyeing it a new color next month since I'll be at another concert, but I'm still torn between orange or teal.

Are there any framed pictures in the room you’re in?     Yes.

Have you ever been to a Broadway show?     Not at Broadway, but I've been to a musical production if that counts as anything lol. I watched Miss Saigon last year.

What’s your favorite movie soundtrack?     Continued from...man, who knows. A week and a half ago I think? I will always swear by the Twilight Saga: New Moon OST.

Do you prefer group or individual work?     It depends on the work. If the work is heavy on my strengths then I could get by alone. Then obviously I'd feel the opposite if I'll need to do something I'm not particularly good or confident at.

Do you have a key to anything besides your house?     My car.

Are you wearing anything with stripes?   Yes, my top has stripes!

What time did you go to sleep last night?     I have no idea- it must have been anywhere between 3 to 5 AM.

Did anyone tell you you were beautiful today?     Nope.

What show did you last watch?     When Life Gives You Tangerines. I don't think I will continue it though... 16 episodes for a K-drama is too long for me.

Do you think you’ll do anymore surveys today?     I always say I will then I end up not touching this blog again for another week or so, so probably not.

What’s your favorite ice cream flavor?     Cookies and cream :)

When was the last time you stayed home from school sick?     *Work, but 2023 when I was out with a really really high fever. It had just been a little under a month since I recovered from Covid, so falling sick again almost immediately had been equal parts worrying, frustrating, and amusing.

Could you ever complete a 500-piece puzzle?     I did but it was done with someone else. Not sure I'd have the patience to complete one all by myself.

If you could run a red light and not get caught, would you?     Never.

Do any bands flat-out annoy you?     There are some K-pop groups that do lol

Do you have a mirror in your bedroom?   Yup.

Was today a birthday for any of your friends?     No.

When was the last time you rode in a limo?     I've never been inside one.

Do you take naps daily?     I don't.

Do you still make Christmas lists? I mean I start an Excel sheet so I don't lose track of 1) who to get gifts for, and 2) what gift to get them - if that's what you mean by list. I don't make wishlists of what I want as gifts though.

Do you watch the show Dexter?     I started it many many years ago but it just could not reel me in. Then again I heard the finale sucked? or like the final season or whatever it was? so I don't feel any fomo about never completing it.

Have you ever been to any sort of convention?     I went to the very first YouTube Fanfest in Manila when YouTubers were still a thing - it was I think in 2015 and the Jaspoli trio were at their absolute prime and came in as the headliners.

I've also attended a few conventions for work but I don't feel like getting into them because duh work and I was barely interested in them.

Which song did you last listen to on repeat?     Probably Untitled, 2014 by GD -- I listen to it multiple times a day and I'm pretty sure it will easily take the cake of my most-listened-track in my future Spotify Wrapped.

Where do you want to live when you grow up?     The city.

Are you currently using a blanket?     I have no use for one at the moment.

Are there any songs that make you cry?  There isn't a song that makes me cry every time I hear it, but yeah I can think of a couple that can very easily get me caught up in my feelings and have my chest feeling constricted and heavy. One is We Are Bulletproof: The Eternal by BTS; the other is First Love by Suga.

Still Life by Bigbang is also the newest member of the club.

How many siblings do you have?     Two.

What are you doing this weekend?     I'll need to hyperfocus on making the bracelets I'm giving out as concert freebies because GD's con is just a little over 2 weeks from now and I'm planning to handmake 88 pieces!

Do you prefer swimming at the beach or in a pool?     Beach, always.

When was the last time you had a haircut?     Around 3 weeks ago, for Hobi's con.

Which musical instrument do you think sounds the prettiest?     I can never pick among piano, saxophone, and violin.

Do you know what you want for Christmas?     I have an idea haha but nothing too specific!

Do you watch fireworks on New Year’s Eve?     Yes, it's always been a family tradition.

Is your birthday within the next three months?     No, it just passed.

How long is the song you’re listening to?     3:19.

Are you anticipating anything this week?     Just for me to get tired because of work...

Is your mom or dad the older parent?     Dad is but only by 8 months - they were born in the same year.

Do you watch anything on E!?     I used to when I was younger but does that channel still even exist? Hahaha I'd have no clue tbh I exclusively use apps on the TV now.

Are you going to get off the computer now that you’ve finished this? Yeahhh, I'll need to start making more bracelets. :)

[rhys-ravenfeather]

Okay. Tomorrow will make exactly 100 days until my two-year anniversary at Walmart (i.e. when I can start looking for a new job, and quit this one, according to most business experts/managers).

And I’ve decided that, when I do end up finding a new job and put in my two weeks notice, I’m going to save all my venom for my last day at Walmart. But by that point, I’m not holding anything back. All bets are off. A customer gives me a hard time? They get every curse word in the dictionary.

It’s my last day, and I’m taking out ALL my frustrations of this stupid store, and the bottom feeders who made my job all the harder. No. Regrets.

[bedlamsbard]

Hello (almost doctor?!) bard! Hope the tail end of the school year is going okay. I have a plot choices question about Of Home Near, which I just binge read and totally fell in love with. What lead to your choice to leave Bucky and Sam unsnapped? It was done so naturally and it felt like it fit in the narrative so well I had to blink and remind myself that it was canon divergent.

Thank you! I'm into summer semester now, which had darn well better be my last semester.

I don't remember exactly when I decided that Bucky and Sam weren't going to be snapped -- I think Bucky, Sam, and Yelena are the big three that don't get snapped in Home but do get snapped in canon. Part of it is the randomness factor; Steve and Natasha don't get snapped in canon, but in Home they're not even there to be snapped, which changes the number of people who can possibly get snapped. *handwave* So that's the internal logic of why Bucky, Sam, and Yelena are still around in Home but not in canon. (Horizon, which is also an IW AU, has similar internal logic for why characters who are snapped in canon don't get snapped in that fic: the divergence means that there are different people around and in theory the Snap is ~random. Which is also the reason that there are different people snapped/unsnapped in Home, Horizon, and canon -- i.e., Thor gets snapped in Horizon/Yonder but is still around in Home, Alexei is snapped in Home but is still around in Horizon.)

For Bucky and Sam specifically, I don't remember when I made that decision but I think it was very, very early on, possibly even before I started writing. Part of it is just so Steve's life isn't so god damn miserable; the Snap is bad enough as it is. But it's also to balance out the characters in the 1945 timeline: Bucky isn't there in 1945 even though the rest of the Howlies and SSR are, but he is there in 2018. There was never going to be a 1945 Bucky/Winter Soldier in this story. That was never an option; that empty space always had to be there. There was a lot of speculation in the comments right up until Chapter 13 about when the Winter Soldier would appear and it was making me pretty unhinged, since from my POV it could not be more clear that this was not a Save Bucky fic. He was always, always going to be the ghost in the room in 1945.

I knew that Steve and Natasha were always going to make it back to 2018, though the earliest I think I started saying so was in July 2023, since I do talk a lot about my WIPs and I was trying to stay vague about the outcome until then.

To some extent Sam and Bucky survive the Snap for the comedy factor after the return to 2018; it wouldn't have quite the same effect with any of the canonical survivors. Though you'll note the actual reunion goes differently than this! Also yeah the ENTIRE reason that Tony is there in the 2018 sequence is for the comedy factor. That is also the entire reason the Howard/Steve kiss actually made it into the story. I do stuff because I think it's funny and then I add the emotions in once I actually start writing.

I also thought Bucky and Steve having reverse experiences in 1945 and 2018 was funny, tbh. Steve's got the "I would like to not be brainwashed by the USSR" problem and Bucky is speedrunning Steve's usual Avengers problems.

More seriously, part of Bucky and Sam's survival is just so that Steve's team is there in 2018 as well as in 1945 in a way that they really aren't in canon, since the Avengers seem to fall apart after the Endgame prologue -- it's part of the reason Clint shows up at the compound (which he doesn't do in canon). Yelena (and to some extent Clint) is there to balance that out for Natasha, as well as to provide a mirror for the 21st century Red Room vs. the mid-century Department X.

There is another, more practical reason, which is: seeing Bucky in 2018 is an instant "oh SHIT" for the 1945 gang. As soon as he turns up in the time window, that's a clue that there was weird stuff going on that Steve's only began to touch on. And it's also to give Bucky closure on leaving the Howlies and the SSR -- he was ripped away from them as much as Steve was, but I feel like I never see that touched on in the fandom, so he gets some of it back.

This is more about Bucky than it is about Sam; part of that is because I didn't want to snap one and not the other and because Bucky's the one who's more relevant to this particular part of Steve's narrative, the reasoning is more about him than about Sam. But like -- that's Steve's team. They have to be there in 2018, just like the Howlies are there in 1945.

(I do think that because I didn't snap anyone in Home who didn't also get snapped in canon that there are too many Avengers survivors, especially because I have Clint and Yelena show up at the compound, but I also didn't want to snap anyone who survived canonically. And it ended up being most of Team Cap, minus Wanda, so it does end up feeling unbalanced, but I didn't want to kill anyone else off.)